Monday
I've taken a different approach to eharmony this time. I am communicating with more of the guys that initiate with me than I did before. I'm entertaining some guys I might not have before. Partly because I was pretty swept up with *Arizona pretty quickly and we went from online to offline so quickly that online couldn't compete with offline. But I'm also trying to be less quick to judge. It is easy to be turned off by a statement or two in a profile or judge someone by their pictures when lots of people aren't that photogenic and look better in person so because of this, I have a lot of updates!
I'm communicating with 6 different guys - the three from my last post - *Johannesburg, *Detroit, and *Sacramento plus three others. Only one of the others is worth talking about at this point - let's call him...*Yarmouth.
So! *Detroit and I have gone through all the steps and he "Opened Communication" with me meaning we can email each other on the site, no restrictions on topics or length. He sent me an email, I sent one back. He's really funny, charming. Definitely has a brain and I think I want to meet him! I'm not in a rush, he'll have to want to and ask but the fact that I'd like to meet him is a good sign. I'm not sure if I just like him as a person and it will be a friendly vibe or if in person we'll click.
While I'm not in a rush, I also don't want to email for too long. It's one of my hangups of online dating. You can tell I'm a bit wordy and will get into talking about things and thinking things about him that may not be true in real life. So I just have to be aware of my tendencies to say too much too soon or fall in love on paper when they aren't so charming and engaging in person. Although I think *Detroit would be equally charming in person. I guess we'll see...
*Johannesburg answered my questions and then we exchanged MH/CS's really quickly over the weekend. I feel a click with him. Can't explain it. He seems mature and put together and I like what appears to be his attitude about life. So I sent him my 3 short answer questions last night. I look forward to his answers!
*Sacramento...the one my friend actually meant to hook me up with in real life and that I'm curious about just because we were then matched on eharmony. We don't seem to have as much in common as I would normally like. Even more so, if I didn't know who he was I would have closed communications based on the MH/CS's because he seems keen on starting a family and definitely is more conservative than I'm accustomed to finding attractive. But more to the point I was making off the top today, I'm staying open this time around. And I want to give him a chance to talk to me in person about his goals for his future. Or at least in a real email and not this guided communication stuff.
His 2nd questions to me were...metaphysical. Which I found a bit annoying. It's your first opportunity to ask me something, anything about me and you ask me if I had three wishes, what would they be? Right...I'm was trying to be less judgemental... I answered honestly, as honestly as you can to questions that seemed somewhat pointless. Sorry...there I go again. But now its up to him to open communication and see what a conversation would be like. I'm still open to it, I swear. Wouldn't it be ironic if he is the guy for me after all? I guess we'll see...
The new player in this is *Yarmouth. He sent me an "icebreaker" yesterday saying he liked my smile. I sent him one back this morning that said his profile seemed interesting, why doesn't he fill in more of the fields - remember these are predetermined messages - a very limited selection but I like that one when it applies. And then he did fill in more of his profile and sent me his first questions! I like the initiative. So I answered his and sent him mine.
He answered - and by now in this process with eharmony I like being surprised by responses but there are certainly answers I consider "more right" or "less right" in my expectations and his are all "more right". Pretty much what I wanted the answers to be when I picked those questions. Interesting. So I sent my MH/CS's...and he sent his back. At this rate we're going to fly through all of the steps of "guided communication" in one day - that would be a first! Not an unwelcome first either. It means there's no game, no pretense of waiting a day or two to respond to not seem too eager or something silly like that. Which is something I've been guilty of for sure but only in response to them doing it first. So I will send my 2nd questions and hope to get his back tonight too, I'll let you know tomorrow...this post has been long enough! That's what happens when you don't write for a week!
Tally for day 15.1...
No. of Guys Communicating with: 6
Open Communication with: 1 - possibly 2 by the end of today!
Butterflies brewing: 0 - but I'm hopeful they'll start if I meet any of these new guys
I've taken a different approach to eharmony this time. I am communicating with more of the guys that initiate with me than I did before. I'm entertaining some guys I might not have before. Partly because I was pretty swept up with *Arizona pretty quickly and we went from online to offline so quickly that online couldn't compete with offline. But I'm also trying to be less quick to judge. It is easy to be turned off by a statement or two in a profile or judge someone by their pictures when lots of people aren't that photogenic and look better in person so because of this, I have a lot of updates!
I'm communicating with 6 different guys - the three from my last post - *Johannesburg, *Detroit, and *Sacramento plus three others. Only one of the others is worth talking about at this point - let's call him...*Yarmouth.
So! *Detroit and I have gone through all the steps and he "Opened Communication" with me meaning we can email each other on the site, no restrictions on topics or length. He sent me an email, I sent one back. He's really funny, charming. Definitely has a brain and I think I want to meet him! I'm not in a rush, he'll have to want to and ask but the fact that I'd like to meet him is a good sign. I'm not sure if I just like him as a person and it will be a friendly vibe or if in person we'll click.
While I'm not in a rush, I also don't want to email for too long. It's one of my hangups of online dating. You can tell I'm a bit wordy and will get into talking about things and thinking things about him that may not be true in real life. So I just have to be aware of my tendencies to say too much too soon or fall in love on paper when they aren't so charming and engaging in person. Although I think *Detroit would be equally charming in person. I guess we'll see...
*Johannesburg answered my questions and then we exchanged MH/CS's really quickly over the weekend. I feel a click with him. Can't explain it. He seems mature and put together and I like what appears to be his attitude about life. So I sent him my 3 short answer questions last night. I look forward to his answers!
*Sacramento...the one my friend actually meant to hook me up with in real life and that I'm curious about just because we were then matched on eharmony. We don't seem to have as much in common as I would normally like. Even more so, if I didn't know who he was I would have closed communications based on the MH/CS's because he seems keen on starting a family and definitely is more conservative than I'm accustomed to finding attractive. But more to the point I was making off the top today, I'm staying open this time around. And I want to give him a chance to talk to me in person about his goals for his future. Or at least in a real email and not this guided communication stuff.
His 2nd questions to me were...metaphysical. Which I found a bit annoying. It's your first opportunity to ask me something, anything about me and you ask me if I had three wishes, what would they be? Right...I'm was trying to be less judgemental... I answered honestly, as honestly as you can to questions that seemed somewhat pointless. Sorry...there I go again. But now its up to him to open communication and see what a conversation would be like. I'm still open to it, I swear. Wouldn't it be ironic if he is the guy for me after all? I guess we'll see...
The new player in this is *Yarmouth. He sent me an "icebreaker" yesterday saying he liked my smile. I sent him one back this morning that said his profile seemed interesting, why doesn't he fill in more of the fields - remember these are predetermined messages - a very limited selection but I like that one when it applies. And then he did fill in more of his profile and sent me his first questions! I like the initiative. So I answered his and sent him mine.
He answered - and by now in this process with eharmony I like being surprised by responses but there are certainly answers I consider "more right" or "less right" in my expectations and his are all "more right". Pretty much what I wanted the answers to be when I picked those questions. Interesting. So I sent my MH/CS's...and he sent his back. At this rate we're going to fly through all of the steps of "guided communication" in one day - that would be a first! Not an unwelcome first either. It means there's no game, no pretense of waiting a day or two to respond to not seem too eager or something silly like that. Which is something I've been guilty of for sure but only in response to them doing it first. So I will send my 2nd questions and hope to get his back tonight too, I'll let you know tomorrow...this post has been long enough! That's what happens when you don't write for a week!
Tally for day 15.1...
No. of Guys Communicating with: 6
Open Communication with: 1 - possibly 2 by the end of today!
Butterflies brewing: 0 - but I'm hopeful they'll start if I meet any of these new guys
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