I'm a 32 year old single woman living in the fabulous Metropolitan city of Toronto. I have a great career in television, an amazing group of friends and a very active social life. I play sports, run a book club, take guitar lessons, see bands, movies, go to the theatre, museums, symphony, everything this great city has to offer. So where are the men in this city that I'm doing it all alone?
Working in tv, I am surrounded by some of my good friends and a diverse group of young people with whom to share all of life's experiences. It's winter in Toronto and this leaves us all inside more often having more and more water cooler-type conversations. Inevitably, our dating sagas and duds are a frequent topic...
There seems to be a consensus among my friends (male & female, single and coupled) that the pool of great single men is lacking here. No offense guys, just speaking of a survey of experiences and looking around at the big group of amazing, hot, single women I have the pleasure of knowing. This is not in any way meant to be one of those man-bashing blogs, au contraire! I am hoping this blogs ends with some sort of happily ever after!
I've never online dated. I've always been fairly anti-online dating, saying it's not for me, I don't trust it or myself. I like that chemistry of meeting someone and the process of flirting in person. I know there are success stories out there but I personally don't have people in my immediate circle that have had anything other than a smattering of dates and hours of fun checking out, flirting with and talking to other single people. But no relationships. I also love my life and thinks it's very full as is and going on a number of bad dates on my fairly limited free time just doesn't sound like it's for me.
So where does eharmony come in? We got to talking in the office last week. A particularly frigid and depressing week - I love Toronto but there are days in January and February that can be nothing short of oppressive and we all feel it. I was feeling it. My friend, let's call her *Stevie, and I had just both had mediocre Friday night dates - hers a new guy and mine just someone to pass the time with a few times a year (don't worry, it's very mutual). A guy friend in the office talked about his new foray into the online dating world of okcupid and a familiar conversation about online options ensued: plentyoffish, lavalife, etc, etc... eharmony. Wait, what's eharmony? Isn't that the service with those adorable couple commercials? Stevie says she filled out a profile a year ago but has not paid for it, the profile was really long and kind of fun, I should just do it for the fun of it. They send you matches but you can't see them until you pay, no harm, no commitment, just fill out the profile? Sure, why not?
There's something about eharmony that's very intriguing in ways other online sites aren't. They claim to actually match you to other people based on a number (29 dimensions for anyone interested) of factors based on your initial questionnaire. It is long and kind of fun to fill out. I love surveys though so that was an easy sell on me! And they'll send you matches right away to see if you think it's worth paying the money.
So I filled it out. The next day I had a flood of emails from eharmony saying I had new matches. I read all of their profiles and was impressed with the ways they seemed fairly compatible with me. Lawyers, a guy in film, a teacher, some consultants, sales reps, some IT people, graphic artists, a wide array of men and all local! You can choose your geographic preferences but it was still good to know there are a number of guys in Toronto on here to possibly meet.
I was interested. It isn't like other sites where you randomly search for people with no direction other than hopefully hotness. They send them to you and if you want to see their pictures you have to pay. That's fair I think. There's a certain level of commitment to meeting someone real - at least in my head and that's what we're here to find out! - when you've paid for a service. How much? $250 CDN for a full year - yikes. That's a lot of money - sort of, it's about $20/mth. Or, $3 months for I think $120 - would have to check my facts there so it's about $40/mth that way. Or...$60 one time fee for one month. $60? Sounds like a deal if it means I meet someone great - it's even a bit of a deal to go on a few possible dates. And not that much to lose if nothing comes of it. I was interested.
I read everything on the site, I read the creator's story, I read the "science" behind the matching, I read the real couple success stories, I read the fine print on what they would do with my credit card info if I only picked the one month (they charge you automatically for $50 for another month). I read the blog where some people complained it didn't work for them and down to the answers that said it does seem to work best for 30-somethings in densely populated areas...And they continued to send me matches of totally good sounding guys. And guys requesting communication with me...
So I start to survey my friends what they think: To E (harmony Or Not To E (harmony). Guys, girls, single, coupled, friends, co-workers - all a resounding YES, DO IT! I also threw the idea out there that I'd create this blog to go along with it so they could all follow along - I'm sure that had a bit to do with the fervor behind the YESSES! but taking that into account they all still said yes. Stevie wants to do it too but wavers, I was still not sure.
Cut to: It's Friday night. And payday. I have a clear credit card and a world full of curiosity about these guys that are supposedly matched for me. One of my best friends, *Natalie, happens to be in town that night and drops by for some glasses, er, um, bottles of wine and I tell her what I'm thinking about. This is a friend who's advice and opinion I take very seriously. She's seen me at my best and worst in the past several years and vice versa. She is so excited by the sound of eharmony and me doing it that she gets up goes to her wallet and hands me $60. Not taking no for an answer, "call it a late Christmas, early birthday, for the wine we've just had whatever present!" I guess I'm signing up. But it's 4am so I think I'll wait for tomorrow!
Working in tv, I am surrounded by some of my good friends and a diverse group of young people with whom to share all of life's experiences. It's winter in Toronto and this leaves us all inside more often having more and more water cooler-type conversations. Inevitably, our dating sagas and duds are a frequent topic...
There seems to be a consensus among my friends (male & female, single and coupled) that the pool of great single men is lacking here. No offense guys, just speaking of a survey of experiences and looking around at the big group of amazing, hot, single women I have the pleasure of knowing. This is not in any way meant to be one of those man-bashing blogs, au contraire! I am hoping this blogs ends with some sort of happily ever after!
I've never online dated. I've always been fairly anti-online dating, saying it's not for me, I don't trust it or myself. I like that chemistry of meeting someone and the process of flirting in person. I know there are success stories out there but I personally don't have people in my immediate circle that have had anything other than a smattering of dates and hours of fun checking out, flirting with and talking to other single people. But no relationships. I also love my life and thinks it's very full as is and going on a number of bad dates on my fairly limited free time just doesn't sound like it's for me.
So where does eharmony come in? We got to talking in the office last week. A particularly frigid and depressing week - I love Toronto but there are days in January and February that can be nothing short of oppressive and we all feel it. I was feeling it. My friend, let's call her *Stevie, and I had just both had mediocre Friday night dates - hers a new guy and mine just someone to pass the time with a few times a year (don't worry, it's very mutual). A guy friend in the office talked about his new foray into the online dating world of okcupid and a familiar conversation about online options ensued: plentyoffish, lavalife, etc, etc... eharmony. Wait, what's eharmony? Isn't that the service with those adorable couple commercials? Stevie says she filled out a profile a year ago but has not paid for it, the profile was really long and kind of fun, I should just do it for the fun of it. They send you matches but you can't see them until you pay, no harm, no commitment, just fill out the profile? Sure, why not?
There's something about eharmony that's very intriguing in ways other online sites aren't. They claim to actually match you to other people based on a number (29 dimensions for anyone interested) of factors based on your initial questionnaire. It is long and kind of fun to fill out. I love surveys though so that was an easy sell on me! And they'll send you matches right away to see if you think it's worth paying the money.
So I filled it out. The next day I had a flood of emails from eharmony saying I had new matches. I read all of their profiles and was impressed with the ways they seemed fairly compatible with me. Lawyers, a guy in film, a teacher, some consultants, sales reps, some IT people, graphic artists, a wide array of men and all local! You can choose your geographic preferences but it was still good to know there are a number of guys in Toronto on here to possibly meet.
I was interested. It isn't like other sites where you randomly search for people with no direction other than hopefully hotness. They send them to you and if you want to see their pictures you have to pay. That's fair I think. There's a certain level of commitment to meeting someone real - at least in my head and that's what we're here to find out! - when you've paid for a service. How much? $250 CDN for a full year - yikes. That's a lot of money - sort of, it's about $20/mth. Or, $3 months for I think $120 - would have to check my facts there so it's about $40/mth that way. Or...$60 one time fee for one month. $60? Sounds like a deal if it means I meet someone great - it's even a bit of a deal to go on a few possible dates. And not that much to lose if nothing comes of it. I was interested.
I read everything on the site, I read the creator's story, I read the "science" behind the matching, I read the real couple success stories, I read the fine print on what they would do with my credit card info if I only picked the one month (they charge you automatically for $50 for another month). I read the blog where some people complained it didn't work for them and down to the answers that said it does seem to work best for 30-somethings in densely populated areas...And they continued to send me matches of totally good sounding guys. And guys requesting communication with me...
So I start to survey my friends what they think: To E (harmony Or Not To E (harmony). Guys, girls, single, coupled, friends, co-workers - all a resounding YES, DO IT! I also threw the idea out there that I'd create this blog to go along with it so they could all follow along - I'm sure that had a bit to do with the fervor behind the YESSES! but taking that into account they all still said yes. Stevie wants to do it too but wavers, I was still not sure.
Cut to: It's Friday night. And payday. I have a clear credit card and a world full of curiosity about these guys that are supposedly matched for me. One of my best friends, *Natalie, happens to be in town that night and drops by for some glasses, er, um, bottles of wine and I tell her what I'm thinking about. This is a friend who's advice and opinion I take very seriously. She's seen me at my best and worst in the past several years and vice versa. She is so excited by the sound of eharmony and me doing it that she gets up goes to her wallet and hands me $60. Not taking no for an answer, "call it a late Christmas, early birthday, for the wine we've just had whatever present!" I guess I'm signing up. But it's 4am so I think I'll wait for tomorrow!
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